By the time I was in eighth grade (2002-2003), I was very active in my church youth group at Parma Lutheran Church (ELCA). After I had moved to Broadview Heights from Parma, I held on to my friends from church. I absolutely loved being a part of something great; the fellowship this youth group had was incredible. We had huge presence where ever we went; seeing a sea of blue shirts at youth gatherings was common place. We even got a shout out from Lost and Found ("give Parma a chance"). I have many great memories from that youth group, and it certainly had a tremendous part in forming my faith, rather, cementing my faith during my high school years and into college.
I started serving as a lector for Parma Lutheran that year, and people noticed something. The senior ladies at church seemed to know the most. They would approach me during the peace or after the service and say I'd make a good pastor. In my mind all I did was read from Sacred Scripture, but these ladies knew something. At first I stored the thought of being a pastor in the back of my mind to look at later. As I kept reading and participating in the church, the thought was continually brought forward. I had other plans at the time, but something kept calling back.
We move to 2005 when my best friend Jill and I went to the Summer Seminary Sampler at Trinity Lutheran Seminary in Bexley (Columbus), Ohio. She told me about it, and I was very interested so I applied for it as well. I didn't know I got in until I emailed the Seminary to check the status of my application. It was a three week Sampler of service and learning. We participated in helping God's children through out Columbus. We also sampled classes at the seminary. I remember telling New Testament professor Clayton Croy that I would see him in the future (and I did, more later). I was the only male in the group, but that didn't stop me from making great memories. Jill and I were the Parma Lutheran tag-team. I remember laying in Schenk Chapel during the end of a Taize prayer session reflecting on my call, and I said "yes".
In high school, I also preached my first sermon. If I remember correctly, it was Jill and I leading the service while Pastor Jeff (our interim pastor) was on vacation. We, obviously, did not have communion. Jill was the Presider and I was the Preacher. I remember submitting the first draft of my sermon, and being told it was too Old Testament heavy. This is interesting, because getting more reacquainted with the Old Testament is something I still am working on. It was a standard Lutheran sermon, preaching on grace and how our sinfulness doesn't stop God from seeking us. I remember even bringing the Pope down to a "commoner's" level. The sermon was well received, and those same senior ladies (along with others this time) told me I should pursue Lutheran ministry.
With the discovery of certain gifts firmly in place, I still stored them in the "watch later" section of my mind. I still had my plans. We move to the two years of 2006-2007, my junior and senior years in High School. Brecksville-Broadview Heights High School had the blessings of a TV station. I joined Bee-TV my junior year, and started reporting on various school happenings (mainly sports). I even had my own segment on the morning show, interviewing various school athletes. I had a blast with Bee-TV. In my senior year, I earned a position as an anchor on the morning show. I absolutely loved it. I was known for wearing a red sports coat and gold tie when anchoring. I also color commentated sports events. I had fallen in love (puppy love) with broadcasting. I knew what I wanted to do in college and beyond. I wanted to be on TV.
Now at Kent State University (2007-2011) with a ROTC scholarship, I was only a pre-Journalism and Mass Communication major before I switched to Justice Studies. After talking with the ROTC admissions officer, we came to the conclusion that being Active Duty for at least four out of eight years would hurt my chances of a great broadcasting career. Back in 2007, four years of Active Duty was the minimum requirement out of an eight year service obligation following graduation. So I marched on toward graduation and commissioning as a Criminal Justice guy.
During college, I had stopped attending church regularly and filled the weekend gaps with partying like a lot of college students. My faith was on the back burner, and partying and social life was on the front burner. Since practicing my faith was on the back burner, pursuing ministry was not even on the stove. However, my junior year of college (2009-2010) would prove to be another turning point year. It was the year I rediscovered my faith and my call.
After a post-SongFest (Greek philanthropic event) celebration party I had hit the bottom. I woke up, and for one reason or another I noticed my body could not take it anymore; my soul could not take it anymore. I talked with my fraternity brother Devin, a convicted non-denominational Christian about my partying and what I needed going forward. Something stirred my soul to come out of the hardcore party scene and into something more. Looking back I am completely comfortable saying it was the Holy Spirit. It was not an immediate come back, though. I then entered into a period of great despair.
For a little over a month, I thought I was not worthy to talk to the almighty God. I believed that God was not pleased, and so would not listen to what I had to say. Although I would go to church (Trinity Lutheran, ELCA) more often, I still did not feel a connection. I realized the great pain I must have cause our Lord and savior! I would proclaim, "Who am I, Lord? Who am I to speak to your majesty?!" The despair was great, but then I ran into a passage in the Bible that I still carry around today. Outside of what Jesus would preach (blessed are the poor in spirit, etc) this passage struck me profoundly.
"But now the righteousness of God has been manifested apart from the law, though testified by the law and the prophets, the righteousness of God through faith in Jesus Christ for all who believe. For there is no distinction; all have sinned and are deprived of the glory of God. They are justified freely by his grace through the redemption in Jesus Christ.." (Romans 3:21-24, NAB [emphasis added]). The version I used then read, "...all have fallen short of the glory of God."
What an amazing proclamation by the great Apostle St. Paul! Once I ran across this passage the despair departed me. I was on fire once again. I began to pray again. I began to reflect on the "yes" I gave to our Lord on the floor of Schenk Chapel. Praise the Lord for He is good! My faith was now on the front burner, and my call to ministry was on the burner next to it. I utilized Campus Crusade events, and met with their ministers to get a push start to where I was in 2007.
As I continued moving toward graduation, I finally listened to what the senior ladies at church introduced in 2002/2003 academic year. I contacted Trinity Lutheran Seminary and began marching toward ministry. In ROTC and my fraternity I would eventually lead simple Bible studies. I lead Bible studies in the field at Joint Base Lewis McChord during ROTC field training. I was elected fraternity Chaplain. My faith was once again on fire, and actually more on fire than ever before.
I graduated in 2011 with a BA in Justice Studies and commissioned as a Second Lieutenant in US Army/Ohio Army National Guard. I would begin to attempt to enter Chaplain Candidacy for the National Guard and start at Trinity Lutheran Seminary that fall. I was so happy with where I was. God certainly never stopped being faithful during my years away. He will always be faithful. I was ready to enter seminary and continue pursuing my call to ministry.
I absolutely loved Trinity. The people I met there are amazing. The fellowship, prayer, service, learning, and community was incredible. I was in a good place in life. I thought everything was set, and that I simply had to press on and eventually I would be a Lutheran pastor. That all changed in January 2012 when I took Urban Ministry for my January Term. It was an interesting course; defining "urban" and visiting different churches and ministries. One church we visited was Holy Family Catholic Church in Columbus. We attended the Latin Mass, and afterward I would embark on the next part of my journey. It all started with the word "apostolicam" (apostolic). I asked what the Lutheran interpretation of apostolic is, and the journey home was underway.
I will discuss my reversion to Catholicism in my next post, My Call Story: From Apostolic to Crossing the Threshold. Thank you for reading. God bless you.
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