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21 May 2018

StCYM: The Holy Spirit and Living (20 MAY 18)

This week the Church begins her celebration of The Holy Spirit. Pentecost is a season where we reflect on the mighty power of the Holy Spirit. The Holy Spirit fills us with various gifts (wisdom, understanding, knowledge, counsel, fortitude, piety, and fear of the Lord) that aid us in living fruitful lives for the glory of God. The same Spirit that entered the disciples on Pentecost fills us today! When we really reflect on that we will be amazed.

At SNS this week we enjoyed the lives God gave us. We welcomed the 8th graders and played basketball and had a couple relays. We glorified God by using the bodies He gave us to have fun, increase our physical fitness,  and most importantly grow closer to each other through sport. It was a great time. My knees actually aren't dead this time around (praise God for knee sleeves!).

Recently, I have been reflecting on how to live life. Some people think that living a holy and pious life means perpetual time in prayer. While time in prayer is indeed vital to a thriving spiritual life, we are not called to ignore life's leisure either. This is something I have to remind myself. God does not want us to be miserable. If you find joy in a certain activity that is moral and beneficial, by all means pursue it with joy. Living life can be a form of perpetual prayer. Being the best versions of ourselves glorifies God. This includes our leisure time!

So, enjoy your leisure time and do not feel guilty for doing so.

Pax,

Johannes

14 May 2018

StCYM: Self Care (13 MAY 18)

This week we were supposed to learn about Mary, but I had to cancel SNS last minute, due to illness. I apologize if this wrecked the week. Since I had to cancel last minute, I was inspired to focus this week's reflection on self care. It is something so easily ignored and under appreciated that we don't realize we need it until something bad happens.

What is self care? Self care is simply put taking care of yourself physically, emotionally, mentally, and spiritually. Stress is a killer, literally, and can lead to all sorts of problems. One of these problems is a weakened immune system. Going prolonged periods free of rest and relaxation is not healthy. This is why I take self care seriously. I take my off days and vacation days to make sure I am the best I need to be for the people I am called to serve.

However, this weekend the recent few weeks of non-stop work and events caught up to me and on Sunday after the noon Mass I did not feel well at all. An hour-long nap didn't take care of it either. Usually, if I am feeling a little out of it, a good nap takes care of it and I'm back in business. I realized if I attempted to host SNS, it would be miserable for everyone, which is why I decided to cancel it. I hate canceling on anything, especially important events like SNS.

After good rest and the help of some DayQuil, I feel much better today. I apologize for not taking care of myself in the past few weeks. So the moral of the story is to make self care a priority. Get what you need done, but give yourself a break if you need a break. It is important to note that there is a difference between wanting a break and needing one. If you need a break, though, do not fight through it too long. You are not good for anyone, if you're not good. Remember, even the Creator of the universe took a rest.

Pax,
Johannes

07 May 2018

StCYM: Moving Forward! III (6 MAY 18)

We concluded our series "Moving Forward!" with a discussion on responsibilities regarding various decisions that need to be made in high school. These discussions addressed key aspects of decision making that are important to include. We also had time to play games (as promised) and write letters to the eighth graders. We concluded with a word storm prayer regarding decision making.

When discussing responsibilities we identified a preparation process before taking the big leap. For example, when applying to a college it is important to do the things necessary to make the application stand out. Simply applying will make it difficult to gain acceptance. A student needs to be involved in high school to make their application mean something. This involvement includes getting good grades and being involved in various clubs.

We also discussed our responsibilities regarding the Faith. We are responsible for following the Church's teachings. Participating in the Sacraments and serving others are major responsibilities that will impact our disposition and can positively influence our decision making process. When making a major decision it is important to go to Mass regularly and pray fervently. Doing this will not only create a stable structure, which creates peace, but it will also get God involved in our lives. God wants us to involve Him verything we do.

Moving forward (see what I did there?), we will learn about Mary the Mother of God, enjoy the weather, invite the 8th graders for another open house, and conclude the spring semester with a cookout. I look forward to what summer has in store and what the Holy Spirit will do in this ministry.

02 May 2018

Discerning the Will of God: Discovering Yourself

Much of a person discerning a particular vocation is geared toward finding God. This is certainly good, because to realize God's Will requires a relationship with God. This is common for me as well. However, I often lose myself when looking for God. Sure, gaining God and losing oneself is biblical (Matthew 16:25), but when does looking for God turn into building God? When does discerning God's Will become building God's Will? In recent months I have answered this question.

Over the past few months a great amount of healing took place. I finally reached the freedom to choose or the equilibrium required to make the best decision regarding the clarity from God through discernment. I finally opened the door to my heart after leaving it sealed off for years. This was all thanks to God's goodness, a great group of friends, a persistent youth minister, and an amazing vocation director. In discussion with our vocation director, I was referred to an amazing book titled "Living Celibacy" by Gerdenio Sonny Manuel, SJ. It discussed celibacy from a psychological perspective, which was very helpful. It turned out to be my next "Apostolicam moment".

My last Apostolicam moment came in 2012 when I was at a Latin Mass with my Lutheran seminary class, which moved me to return to the Church. This time I was moved to open the door to my heart. When I opened this door I addressed what was within it through prayer, therapy, and great conversations with friends and priests. When I reached equilibrium I could no longer deny what I was doing for the past several years; I was not receiving my vocation, I was building one. I was constructing my tower of Babel and it was time for it to come crashing down.

For a few weeks following this I discerned where my mind AND heart were being led. I can say with confidence they are being led, not forced, away from the priesthood and toward marriage. This may come as a shock to many of you because of my stubborn stance regarding where I wanted to go despite what it would do to me. Going back to Matthew 16:25, I was seeking to make my life and ignore Christ's call. I was losing myself to my tower of Babel. I was attempting to construct the Will of God. When I opened the door to my heart, the Holy Spirit was so clear and this clarity requires action.

Since rediscovering all of myself, my life has improved. My prayer is more fruitful and my relationship with God is stronger. I am filled with true joy once again and my friends and colleagues have noticed. Even people that didn't know my much of my discernment recognized a refreshment since making this decision to discern marriage. This joy is from God and it is beautiful beyond words. I have a hard time putting this refreshment into words.

Thank you all for your many years of prayers and support. Thank you for your patience and love it means a lot to me. I apologize for any pain I caused due to my blindness. God is good! God will provide! I am overjoyed by God's goodness. To Him belongs all praise and glory. Now that I have allowed my heart to have a say, I can move forward glorifying God better than before! I am excited for what the future holds! Thank you again and God bless you all!

Pax,

Johannes


Deus invictus! Deus providebit!